Hello there friends & readers,
Wow, it is almost 2016. That means Your Polite Friend has been posting for a year now. CRAZY! Thank you everyone who has been following me. As we prepare to shake off the dust of 2015, one question seems to rear its head each and every year: “What the Heck am I supposed to wear to this party?!?!”
Oh for the days when dress codes were written in stone: No showing your bosom before 3 o’clock, never leave the house without a hat, weddings meant tuxedos for men and long dresses for women. But as society progressed, our standards of dress have become much more relaxed, to the point that even the Tuxedo has taken on a new meaning (at least in San Francisco where it means Jeans and a Hoodie). So here is your guide for interpreting dress codes on any New Years Eve party invitations you might get or weddings in the next year:
White Tie - THE MOST FORMAL
White Tie events rarely happen much these days. Unless you often go to the White House, Buckingham Palace or High Society Weddings, more people don’t need to worry about having a go to White Tie outfit.
For Women
- Formal (floor length) evening gown, No Oscar cleavage or thigh-high slits; a shoulder wrap or jacket that matches the dress if it is cold.
- Long gloves (optional but recommended)
- Small evening bag
For Men
- Black dress coat (tailcoat), matching trousers with a single stripe of satin or braid in the US; two stripes in Europe or the UK
- White piqué wing-collared shirt with stiff front
- Braces (suspenders), to ensure a good fit
- Shirt studs and cuff links
- White vest
- White bow tie
- White or gray gloves
- Black patent shoes and black dress socks
- Hair and facial hair well groomed.
Black Tie
Black Tie is generally what most people mean by “Formal”. Usual for wedding or nicer events. Depending on you age, it is a good idea to have a goto Black Tie Formal outfit in your closet.
For Women
- Formal (floor length) evening gown - a little more cleavage or a slightly higher slit than you would wear for White Tie is SOMETIMES OK (Depending on the Event); A wrap or nice jacket are a good addition, doesn’t have to be matching.
- Dressy cocktail dress
- Your dressiest “little black dress”
For Men:
- Black tuxedo jacket and matching trousers
- Formal (piqué or pleated front) white shirt
- Shirt studs and cuff links
- Black bow tie (silk, satin, or twill)
- Black cummerbund to match tie, or a vest
- Dressy braces to ensure a good fit (optional)
- No gloves
- Black patent shoes and black dress socks
- In summer, in the tropics, or on a cruise: White dinner jacket, black tuxedo trousers plus other black tie wardrobe
Creative Black Tie: A little less formal than standard black tie. Best for Prom and other type events.
For Women
- Formal (floor length) evening gown - a little more cleavage or a slightly higher slit than you would wear for White Tie is SOMETIMES OK (Depending on the Event); A wrap or nice jacket are a good addition, doesn’t have to be matching.
- Dressy cocktail dress
- Your dressiest “little black dress”
- Fun or unique accessories
For Men
- Tuxedo combined with trendy or whimsical items, such as a black shirt or a matching colored or patterned bow tie and cummerbund
Black Tie Optional: Often Confused with “Semi Formal”, a Black Tie Optional outfit is a MUST for any adult. This is used for Wedding, Formal work events, Formal Parties etc.
For Women
- Formal (floor length) evening gown - a little more cleavage or a slightly higher slit than you would wear for White Tie is SOMETIMES OK (depending on the event); A wrap or nice jacket are a good addition, doesn’t have to be matching.
- Dressy cocktail dress
- A “little black dress”
- Dressy separates
For Men
- Tuxedo (see “Black Tie” above)
- Dark suit, white dress shirt, and conservative tie
- Leather dress shoes and dark dress socks
Semiformal: A standard for Afternoon Weddings and Company parties. The idea is to look nice and be comfortable.
For Women
- Short afternoon or cocktail dress
- A “little black dress”
- Long dressy skirt and top
- Dressy separates
For Men
- Dark, business suit
- Matching vest (optional)
- Dress shirt
- Tie
- Leather dress shoes and dark dress socks
Festive Attire (usually for the holidays): Holiday themed attire is NO OK outside of the holidays in Question. Men these means that those “charming” ties with Santas or Pumpkins are only good for about 1 month of the year. It is better to invest in Holiday COLORED items that can be better mixed into the rest of your Wardrobe.
For Women:
- Cocktail dress
- Long dressy skirt and top
- Dressy pants outfit or separates
- A “little black dress”
- Feature holiday colors
For Men
- Seasonal sport coat or blazer in color of choice, and slacks
- Open-collar shirt, or dress shirt
- Tie—festive or with a holiday theme
Business Formal*: Typically worn to Interviews or corporate gatherings.
Women
- Suit
- Business-style dress
- Dress with a jacket
- Stockings (optional in summer)
- Heels, low or high
Men
- Dark business suit
- Matching vest (optional)
- Dress shirt
- Conservative tie
- Leather dress shoes and dark dress socks
Business Casual*: More General Day to Day wear
For Women
- Skirt, khakis, or pants
- Open-collar shirt, knit shirt or sweater (no spaghetti straps or décolleté)
- Dress
For Men
- Seasonal sport coat or blazer with slacks or khakis
- Dress shirt, casual button-down shirt, open-collar or polo shirt
- Optional tie
- Loafers or loafer-style shoes, and socks
*Always check and abide by your company’s dress code
Dressy Casual: Good for a night out to the theater or any event you want to look like you CARE about being at. MEN PLEASE NOTE THAT JEANS ARE NOT DRESSY! Women can get away with it but you can’t. DEAL WITH IT.
For Women
- Dress
- Skirt and dressy top
- Dressy pants outfit
- Nice jeans and dressy top
For Men
- Seasonal sport coat or blazer, and slacks
- Dress shirt, casual button-down shirt, open-collar or polo shirt
- Optional tie
Casual: Good for BBQs, or just around the house. These causal rules can be applied to certain offices but make sure you are not violating dress code.
For Women
- Sundress
- Long or short skirt
- Khakis or nice jeans
- Shorts (depending on occasion and climate)
- Plain T-shirt (no slogans), polo shirt, turtleneck
- Casual button-down blouse
For Men
- Khakis or good jeans (clean, no holes)
- Cargo or Bermuda shorts—depending on occasion and climate
- Plain T-shirt (no slogans), polo shirt, turtleneck
- Casual button-down shirt and/or sweater
- Loafers, sneakers (with or without socks), sandals
That's all for now friends. Please keep checking back for more etiquette tips & questions answered & feel free to write in with any questions!
XOXOXO
Your Amie Polie (That's Polite Friend in French-Talk)
